Did You Hear the One about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy?

This is excerpted from an actual conversation I had with Zoe the other night.

Z: “I just want you to know that two of my friends, K____ and M_____, don’t believe in Santa Claus. I’m not saying this is good or bad, I just thought you should know.”

Me: “Well the good thing about our country is that people can believe anything they want to believe as long as they don’t try to hurt other people with their beliefs or force them to believe something they don’t believe.”

Then Zoe mentioned a clarification of something on her Christmas list.

Me: “You’d better write Santa about that.”

Z: “It’s ok, he just heard me.”

Me: “Oh. OK.”

Z: “I know the Easter Bunny must be real because last year he brought me stick-on earrings and I know you would never buy those for me.”

Me: “Oh. OK.”

Z: “And I’m not sure about the Tooth Fairy because I don’t believe in fairies but I kind of think the Tooth Fairy is real. But I’m not sure.”

I explained to her what a contradiction was. I asked if the Tooth Fairy wasn’t real, who was putting the money under her pillow when she lost a tooth.

She pointed toward me.

I said, “Who? Is there someone in the kitchen who brings you money? Is the Tooth Fairy hiding in here?” She laughed.

And we left it at that.